Trap 1. Skipping mental preparation
Mental presence is essential to respond to people appropriately. Before entering a conversation take a moment, no matter how brief, to clear your mind. Go through this short routine:
- Assess your mental ‘availability’ on a scale from 0 to 7.
- Stand up, breathe out, shrug your shoulders, and look around to shift your focus onto the matter at hand.
- Set your intention for the upcoming conversation.
Trap 2. Underestimating internal distractions
We all wander off sometimes when we listen to someone or jump to conclusions to keep interactions short. Minimize the likelihood of this happening and stay engaged by:
- Nodding, smiling, and maintaining eye contact (these are simple ways to remain present while showing that you care).
- Jotting down key points, if appropriate.
- Interjecting to summarize what you have just heard the person say and check your understanding.
Trap 3. Underestimating external distractions
Many of us have the attention span of a labrador puppy, and notifications, messages, and other external noises interfere with our levels of engagement – so make it easier on yourself and cut out these distractions by:
- Silencing or turning off notifications on devices to avoid interruptions.
- Asking others if they could do the same.
Key learning
It’s easy to find yourself trying to do too much with too little time, then becoming more transactional in your interactions with people as a result – but this is likely to lead to less clarity and collaboration, and more misunderstandings and conflicts. Avoid this through simple steps to be more ‘present’ and less distracted.